“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” ~Viktor E. Frankl
We’ve all had our moments.
The feeling of an overwhelming physical and emotional burden, the feeling of being forced to act more quickly than we are ready to, the playing field shrinking, the walls closing in, the faster heart rate and shallow breathing—the feeling of being invisibly controlled by the weight of some external force, and the deeply-rooted urge to violently fight back against, or flee from this control.
Decisions that are made in this space rarely result in positive outcomes.
Operating in this space usually causes damage that we may spend weeks, months, or years of needless effort attempting to undo.
This is the amygdala response, driven by one of the most primitive parts of our brain.
Better known as the “fight or flight” response, this part of our brain adapted to help us survive immediate threats to our safety.
Would you be surprised to hear that a stressful project, and tense meeting, or even traffic can fire off the same part of our brain, and cause a similar physiological response to being hunted in the wild by a predator?
This part of our brain is stupid.
It can’t tell the difference.
A quick search of “Amygdala Hijack” will show countless studies demonstrating that the modern world is full of stimuli that triggers life and death, survival-based brain activity.
What makes the human brain different than any other species is our meta-cognitive ability.
We are able to then think about, and process our thoughts at a level that no other species can.
Throughout my career, I’ve spoken with countless senior executives and business owners who had the courage to be vulnerable with me in sharing how they manage stress.
Here are some of the patterns that I noticed in successful leaders who processed their experiences differently than blocked leaders:
- They recognize when the amygdala hijack is happening
- They acknowledge that this is natural part of being human, and don’t judge it
- They ask themselves how to best create space (physical and/or mental) to process what they are experiencing, before responding or taking action
- In this space, they question and label what the primitive mind is telling them, using tools such as identifying potential cognitive distortions: https://lnkd.in/gb8shQaj
- They choose to react from a place of meta-cognition, in a calmer and controlled state
- They seek professional help when it’s too much to process on their own
Go for a walk.
Create space to think and unwind.
Yes—get therapy if you need it. We have to admit when we can’t do it alone.
Gain control over the primitive brain; don’t let it hijack you.
What do you do to create space for yourself?